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Friday, May 11, 2007

Ask Yourself First

To serve the purpose of this blog to create awareness among people on building a HAPPY FAMILY FIRST, we will regularly post a question and see other people's response. You will definitely be amazed how different people with different family's core will response.

So what are you waiting for and let the world know how a HAPPY FAMILY should be!!

2 comments:

Mummy_HanaHafizh said...

i'd like to share this article..hope you don't mind mikai.. :-)

~ Love & Marriage: Encouragment from a Brother ~

When I started looking for a wife, my only intention was to find a muslim woman who could help me become a better Muslim. After praying to Allah many times, I came to know that a Muslim brother in my area had an unwed sister. I was told that she was 7 years older than I was, had no college education, and had minor health problems. Despite this, I arranged for a meeting to discuss the possibility of marriage. When I met her, I was impressed by her modesty (she wore a real hijab that covered everything but her face). She was not attractive, nor was she rich. However, at the conclusion of our meeting, I felt comfortable with the fact that she was what I was looking for. After praying Istikhara, I felt confident that she was right for me. Our nikaah was performed only a few weeks later.

Oh yeah, this was a Muslim wedding - the kind where the men separated from the women, we didn't have disco music or belly dancers or any other kind of kuffar stuff. There might have been one brother who was NOT wearing Sunnah. We spent most of the time praying, praising Allah, discussing what a great blessing the responsibility of marriage was, etc. I think the total cost of the wedding might have been around US$20.00 (we held it in my brother-in-law' s apartment). I had the time of my life!!!

Despite the fact that she is very stubborn and argumentative, she is one of the best Muslim women a man could ask for. And I am NOT talking about the way she wakes me up in the middle of the night for tahajjud, the way she covers her face in public, the way she investigates every action that I do, the way she will stop talking to me if I don't read the Qur'an or go to the masjid every day. I am talking about her fear of Allah and love for the prophet Muhammed (Salallaahu' alahiwasalam) .

Not bad for a woman some people called ugly, who has no college education or money.

I wouldn't trade this woman for anything in the world.

Many times when the discussion of marriage arises, I will hear one brother after another talking about how beautiful and educated they want their dream wives to be. Others will talk of love or family/racial pride.

Fools... (with all due respect)

In case some of you are confused as to why I am mentioning all of this let me tell you what I know (straight up)...

A PIOUS WIFE IS YOUR STRONGEST DEFENSE AGAINST SHAYTAAN


Now, Marry a woman for whatever reason you want.......

My dua' is with you all.

Salamu Alaikum.
Your brother,
Iftikhar

Mummy_HanaHafizh said...

and another good article...

~ A Letter for My Brother in Islam: Be a Man! ~



My dear Muslim brother,

Be a Man! Be courageous and faithful. Be strict but kind and wise. Follow the way of our beloved prophet - may the blessings and peace of Allah be upon him - and the way of his companions.

Be a Muslim. Care for your family, brothers and sisters in Islam. Help the elders of the community and show everyone the true spirit of Islam. Be like the prophet (peace be upon him) – “His manners were the Quran.” Make dawa and talk to people about Islam. Be a messenger of the messenger of Allah. The prophet (Salallaahu' alahiwasalam) said: “balligho anny wa law aya” – “tell people something about me, even if 't were one verse”. Help people see and follow the right path. Be a sign that speaks about Islam without even saying a word. Let your actions speak. The Quran says: "Who is better in speech than one who calls (men) to Allah and works righteousness and says I am one of those who bow down in Islam" (Quran: 41, 33)

Be a son. Be a son who is kind and merciful to his parents. Be a son who is patient, understanding and grateful for his parents' endless care and love. Be a son who deserves a parent's du'a for guidance, forgiveness and blessings.

Allah Subhanahu wa ta’ala said: Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honour. (Quran: 17, 23)

Furthermore, Abu Huraira reported that a person came to Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) and said: Who among the people is most deserving of a fine treatment from my hand? He said: Your mother. He again said: Then who (is the next one)? He said: Again it is your mother (who deserves the best treatment from you). He said: Then who (is the next one)? He (the Holy Prophet) said: Again, it is your mother. He (again) said: Then who? Thereupon he said: Then it is your father.

Our beloved prophet (peace be upon him) said in another Hadith: the most actions beloved to Allah are:

1. Salah on time
2. Being good and dutiful to one's parents and
3. Jihad fee sabeel Allah

Be a brother. Be a loving brother; care for your sisters. Drive them instead of letting them walk or use the subway... accompany them instead of letting them go alone. Be a "mixture" of kindness, love, and understanding. Be the one a sister looks up to for advice or help. Be the one she confides in. Teach her and help her be the best Muslimah she can be, but be careful not to scold her or be angry at her, for this way you push her away. The Prophet (Salallaahu' alahiwasalam) said: “La tagdab wa laka al Jannah” - "Do not be angry and you will have the Jannah." So don't be angry when she mistakes, she is a human being.

Be a husband. Love your wife. Teach her and help her. Educate her and appreciate her efforts and work. Be her teacher and advisor, for Allah will hold you accountable for her. Treat her with respect and love as an equal for the prophet (Salallaahu' alahiwasalam) ) continuously urged you: "Be kind (nice) to women."

And lastly...Be a father. Be a role model for your sons and daughters. Be the hero they look up to. Be the one who "shows" instead of "tells" them what is right or wrong. Be the model that your daughter will look up to when seeking a husband. Be the man your son will want to be.

Be a Muslim and be all that. Be the one to take your loved ones with you onto the path of Allah. Be the guardian and soldier who will protect your loved ones, your home and the Ummah from the tricks of the evil Satan.

Be a Man. Be a man with all the qualities and meanings that are encompensated within the word 'Man'.

In one of his khutbas, my beloved syaikh said that “the criteria for determining manliness are not only in terms of material well-being, like good looks, physical agility, material success, but also in terms of excellent virtues and good conduct expressed in good deeds.”

So Be a Man.